Stupid Mario Football is a non-canon spin-off of Stupid Mario Brothers divided into 4 parts.
Mario and Wario are walking down a driveway when several ninjas appear and perform various acrobatics, with Mario commenting on them being impressive. Zubashi halts them and states that it is obvious since they are ninjas. While replying Mario says his name wrong again, though Zubashi says he doesn't care. However, when Wario does this, Zubashi says nothing, instead staring angrily. Mario decides they should head inside, to leave them to "try to be athletic."
Zubashi claims that the ninjas are better athletes then they are, though Mario retorts by insulting his pronunciation of "athlete." In response, Zubashi challenges him to a duel. They continuously ask what he means by "duel," including Super Smash Brothers and Ninja Gaiden, until Zubashi elaborates by stating they will play football. They accept the challenge, but need to put together a team. Zubashi gives them an hour to do so and meet them at the north field, but offers them a forfeit. When Mario refuses, the ninjas simply laugh at them and leave. Mario and Wario then head off to find a team.
Mario and Wario head inside Mario's House. He tells Luigi about their situation and then offers him a place on the team. Luigi notes that they haven't played football "since the movie in 2009," though Wario shoots his point down when he asks what he is talking about. He then repeats the offer, this time Luigi stating that they know nothing serious about the sport. Mario does not care, however, and Wario opts to add Yoshi, Donkey Kong, and Ness to the team; all three of them appear from inside the kitchen and join without question. They have a team, but Luigi asks how they are going to learn to actually play football. Wario then states that he knows what to do, and gives the brothers a crash course.
On the football field, Zubashi is asked by a ninja if the Mario Bros. will even show up. When Zubashi replies that "[they] shall see," Mario and Wario and their team arrive. They agree on the rules: ground rules and limits, only touchdowns for scoring, and the first team to reach thirty points wins. However, Wario asks who the referee will be, as having one from either team would be biased toward them. However, a referee then shows up, who claims to be a former football player and coach. Mario chooses heads for the coin toss upon his asking, and when he tosses the coin it is heads. They then choose to receive, and the ref begins the game.
The ref blows the whistle to begin the game. The ninjas kick off, and the ball is caught by Ness, who is shortly after sacked by Zubashi.
Right after, Wario assigns the team positions: himself as quarterback, Yoshi as guard, Mario running back, Ness tight end, Luigi wide receiver, and Donkey Kong sender. He tells the team their play, though when Mario states his confusion, Wario himself admits to not knowing what he says, and tells Mario to simply be in position when he throws the ball.
The game continues. Wario tosses the ball to Luigi, but he is brought down by a ninja. Zubashi calls a huddle and tells the ninjas that he needs to beat Mario's team for "[his] own selfish reasons." The ninjas agree to help him.
On the first down, Wario attempts to toss the ball, but Zubashi uses his "Secret Ninja Technique: Sack the Quarterback," to, as the name states, sack Wario. The ref calls for "minus nine yards," but Luigi points out that the field has no yard markings, to which the ref replies to "take nine big steps backwards."
For the next play, Wario hands the ball off to Mario. With help from the others, Mario is able to pass by the ninjas and score a touchdown.
Mario kicks off for the next round, but one of the ninjas uses his "Secret Ninja Technique: 90 Yard Punt Return" to catch the ball and cross the entire field to the "end zone," earning his team six points. The ref then calls for a ten minute break, as it is the end of the first quarter.
Break over, the game restarts. Wario tosses the ball to Ness, but he is tackled by one of the ninjas. Zubashi demands that his team "step up the defense," while Wario calls a hustle, telling Mario and Luigi their next play. He fakes a pass to Mario, but really tosses it to Luigi, who runs the ball to the end zone. The score now 12-6, the ref calls half time.
Zubashi notes how his team is playing awfully, then offers a raise to the one who takes out the quarterback. One of the ninjas states that an actual NFL team was caught for this, but Zubashi denies it. Meanwhile, DK is saying something to Ness.
The referee then calls for the second half to begin, with team Mario getting to kickoff. Wario throws the ball to Mario. However, he is surrounded by ninjas and brought down. During their next huddle, Donkey Kong (translated by Ness) suggests a fake play. After the ref performs some acrobatics, the game restarts. One of the ninjas throws the ball, but it is intercepted by Yoshi. He starts running, but is tackled by a pair of ninjas. Zubashi then threatens the ninjas with making them feeling bad about themselves if they do not stop Mario's team. In the end, however, Mario's team wins. Zubashi does not care, though, as he proclaims that they are still better then pirates, then head off to get to another game. When Luigi asks the entire point of the game, Wario states that it was "Just to show how awesome we are at football!" with Mario adding that it was also to show that no one knows Zubashi's name.
- During Mario's football training in Part 2, we can see Matt and Richard's player names (their surnames "Provencal" and "Alvarez") on the football game they are playing.
- In the bloopers, it is seen that, while the audio was cut in the video, in reality, Matt as Wario teaching the team how to play said as follows: "So, I'm the quarterback, Luigi is the runningback, and Mario's the runningback. As long as this guy's in the backfield, it doesn't matter where he goes, but all goes well if the first wide reciever cuts up and goes to the right, and the second wide reciever goes aaaaaaaall the way downfield. If you don't get this, I swear to God I'm gonna kill you, so I hope you get this. If you don't get this, I'll *********************************************************************, if you don't like that, I'm gonna ********** put a stick in your ass, if you don't like that, I'll ************************************************ and I'll put a firecracker up a warthog's ass, if you don't like that, cut the audio..."